


Out of time

by Kthsbot



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Background Dimitri/Queen, M/M, Older Characters, Sick Character, They talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:54:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24379054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kthsbot/pseuds/Kthsbot
Summary: "I had a dream about you," Dimitri explains as if it stands to reason why he would leave his bedroom.They don't have much time.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 7
Kudos: 51





	Out of time

Regardless of Felix's age, the swift knocking on his door still wakes him up.

Felix is used to getting startled from his sleep, trained to be always on the edge of it for battles, sudden bandits disturbances and nightmares. 

It’s not yet the sunrise when Felix glances from his window. Fhirdiad is dark and quiet.

"It's me, Felix," Dimitri whispers. Felix knows this, he'd recognize Dimitri's knocking even if he were deaf. 

He opens the door to the king, "What could possibly make you come here Dimitri, at this hour no less?" He asks as he frowns at the calm and sweet smile on Dimitri’s face, Dimitri’s hand tight on the wooden crutch.

"I had a dream about you," Dimitri explains as if it stands to reason why he would leave his bedroom. It alarms Felix how odd of Dimitri, he was never one for unconcerned acts, uncharacteristically so.

Felix heaves a sigh as he steps aside carefully and lets him in. It's not in his heart to lecture Dimitri at this time especially when his face falls weary, after all, the duke came solely for him. Once Dimitri gets back on his feet, Felix will have his way with him again.

"You had a dream about me, so you decided to come to my chambers and tell me at Goddess knows how late?" He grumbles, glaring up at Dimitri as he slowly takes a seat on the bed. 

Dimitri's health is falling. Anything could exhaust him, which is why Felix had come back, asking Sylvain and Ingrid to visit Dimitri too. The queen had sent him a letter that Dimitri didn’t rest. 

“He is very sick,” she said. But she can't seem to make him ease off from his duties, this wouldn’t be the first time Dimitri puts the kingdom before himself.

Felix, however,  _ will  _ force him to rest. Will make sure Dimitri doesn't get out of his bed until he is completely healthy. And truthfully it's an exercise in futility.

The healer had told Felix after he arrived that Dimitri’s condition had worsened and the disease was roughly fatal. 

There is no out of this, Dedue had even brought Mercedes to examine him one more time after Felix got aggressive and forceful with the royal healer, he wasn't convinced. Dimitri is stronger than any illness. Dimitri is stronger than anything. He had come back from war countless times, had defeated an army whole by himself. This is not going to take him from Felix.

Sylvain is supposed to arrive in the morning because Dimitri doesn't have much time left. He’ll help.

"I couldn't wait until the morning, my apologies Felix," he says and steadies the walking stick next to the wall, Felix watches as he settles himself in while he draws the covers over himself as though Felix has invited him to sleep next to him. 

"You left the queen to come and sleep here, next to your advisor, Dimitri. Because of a silly dream." He says sharply, Dimitri shouldn't move, shouldn't have left the warmth of his bed and the caution  drops Felix puzzled, with a bitter taste in his mouth.

Dimitri just hums in response. "Wouldn't it be nice Felix? The last time I laid next to you was forty years ago or so." His sky blue eyes never changed, never age like the rest of him, like his soft, fair hair that had gone slightly grey. Some of it still falls over his eyes, secretes them and waits for Felix to tuck them away, he had a liking to do so, back in the days when their relationship was still fragile and it’d catch Dimitri off guard.

Felix still stares at it in adoration. It's messily cut, long and short in parts, because despite being married and the leader of a country, Dimitri has grown into the habit of cutting his hair on his own. Felix has scolded him about it frequently and when Dimitri didn't let go of it, Felix later bought him a small, elegant blade. Not even the queen herself can ask Dimitri to get rid of it now. 

"There is a reason we don't sleep in the same bed anymore, Your Majesty," he answers while he is still trying to piece together this night. 

"We're old Felix, I agree, but what's the harm now? I could leave at any time, you must let me enjoy my last days, as my right hand." He teases quietly. It's a funny look on him but Felix can’t joke about it, not when he speaks of his death like it's tomorrow, like he'll be really gone and has already given up. 

"Dimitri. Don't make me kick you out. I don't care how old you are or if you're the king," he says grimly as finally, he lies beside him. 

"When have I heard that before, hmmm." Dimitri slowly grins.  _ The king is an idiot _ , Felix thinks to himself. 

The duke gathers his hair away from his face, in a tight grip to tie the long dark strands, but there is a rough hand at his wrist. "Don't, I'd feel as if I interrupted your comfort and it looks lovely like this" Dimitri almost pouts, Felix blinks as if he saw a flicker of the young prince for a second.

"You did, you woke me up in the middle of the night, tell me now, what is this dream about." he pretends to be irritated, but it’s just a kind hiss, leaving his hair loose, resting at the pillow and tucking the rest of him under the sheets, next to Dimitri. 

Dimitri rolls over to face him, locking his eyes with Felix’s, and Felix lets himself breathe Dimitri in, taking the chance to finally stare at him. The blue eyes stay the same, still, the most beautiful eyes Felix's eyes have set his gaze upon. The rest of his face had aged, but Felix still admires it, still brushes against the old wrinkles. He had seen them form, he had been there next to Dimitri always and he had loved every Dimitri. 

He had loved the white hairs just as the golden locks. didn't matter when Felix caressed them, the tender skin is still soft against Felix's dry fingers. 

“Tell me,” He urges.

"We were back in the academy, the war had just ended. It was a  remarkable night, the sky had been lightened with stars.” Felix remembers, it was exceptional to say the least for  Garreg Mach ’s sky to be filled with stars, even when they were at the top of the mountain. 

“You had been lying next to the training field and I planted myself by your side.” He smiles apologetically. Felix wants to get angry with him again. 

“And we talked and talked and talked until I fell asleep,” Felix almost snorts at that. “But then I had heard you, promising me that you’d always stay by my side.” He is whispering, between them and the night. 

“Have I broken my promise?” 

“Never.” the burning blue eyes, never leave Felix’s. And if they were younger, if they had time, Felix would’ve looked the other way. Instead, Felix smiles at him, contented. As his memory carries him to when he had sworn his life to the prince, so to do what he was born for. When he stood as he watched Dimitri fall and fall until he broke. When he saw how defeated Dimitri was, he pledged to keep him strong and victorious with his sword, yet, now he stands helpless against this sickness. 

There is a long silence before one of them speaks again, "Felix, how come you've never taken a wife?" Dimitri asks, eyes glittering. He knows the answer yet he still asks again and again. 

"I didn't take a liking to anyone and no one had ever done so to me either," A memorised answer, every time and Felix can’t help but avert his eyes away from Dimitri’s, fingers still tracing the creases around the mouth, consistent and easy on the skin. 

"That's false, ladies used to swoon over you more so than Sylvain even, especially after the war." He voices, determined to bring another answer of Felix.

"And I didn't take the chance then, and here I am. The old lonely man beside you." He says flatly. 

But Dimitri looks like he won't back down today, pressing his palms against the fingers stroking over his lips and stopping them. "Felix, even Hanneman at the age of his, found a consort after the war. Why won't you even try?" He pauses, eyes darting over the room and brows frowning, "I just... I think you deserve something good, the best, Felix... You deserve the best."  _ You're the best. You are all I could ask for.  _

The unspeakable truth hangs in the air. 

"I feel guilty." He finally admits, "The kingdom stole that from you, overloading you work and stupid matters."

"That's my duty, Dimitri."  _ The kingdom stole you from me. _

"Maybe now Sylvain can convince you to use some of his old courting habits, or coy moves." Dimitri snorts a laugh and Felix tries to resist a fond smile. Sylvain would still be happy to do so, even at their age. 

"I don't need you to worry about me Dimitri, when you'd get better, I promise I will search for someone suited." He means it when he speaks, he’ll try the least. 

"When I'd get better," Dimitri repeats, a blunt lie.

  
  
  


They talk some more as the dim light of the sunrise sinks into the room gentle on them. Dimitri has his head on the Duke's lap. Felix is braiding the worn hairs because Dimitri had asked it of him, ‘one last memory. I want to remember.’ Felix swallows the tears as they gather like they did when they were eleven and Dimitri would go back to the Capital, Felix had always sobbed and whimpered when the little prince would leave him. The only calming thought was that he'd always come back, they would meet again. 

Felix begged his father back then and he wishes he could plead to anyone now to leave Dimitri with him some more, but he knows the goddess is ruthless when she steals Glenn, his father and now she wants Dimitri. She will leave the lone wolf finally by himself, how generous of her. 

"Do you believe in fate, Felix?" he asks abruptly. 

"Do you think a man like me does?" Felix sneers softly. 

Dimitri makes a sound of agreement, "I don't either... but I thank the goddess every day to whatever blessed me with you." he takes a breath and Felix watches as his chest rises and falls heavily, “I knew I’d never die in a battle so long as I had you by my side and the goddess must’ve known too, to send disease to take me.” he looks up at Felix, who has the king’s hair tangled between the pale fingers. Eyes like dawn, bright with tears. Tears that haven't fallen in so long. Dimitri's eyes crinkle at the corners. “I suppose, we’ve always been each other’s fate.” 

It strikes Felix that Dimitri has been thinking about this a lot, of course, he prepared a speech, and it takes a lot to swallow the reason behind it. 

"You’re speaking like the dead." He breaths out, between the warm tears. 

  
  
  
  
  


The thought aches when Dimitri asks him, "Are you going to take care of him when I'm no longer alive?" He is sincere and it sounds like a curiosity, not a request.

After all, Fraldarius are known for making certain promises to their dead kings.

Yet, as years go by and Felix’s rough edges supple, Dimitri’s child grows into his father’s pointed features and it can’t be helped how Felix unfolded a soft spot for the young prince. Felix comes to understand his old man slowly. 

"I'll tell you, us Fraldarius don't make great fathers." It steals another grin from the king. "But I'll take good care of him, he is old enough anyway." He pauses, knows he is giving it the true answer to the question Dimitri posed when he carries on, "But I'll quit serving the country." 

"That, I figured." 

"He'll still have Sylvain to guide him." 

"Oh, how Sylvain will have his fun." He smiles warmly and Felix wants to scream at him, ‘you've always given up on yourself too easily.’

“You raised him well, don’t worry,” he mutters instead, Dimitri looks so tired.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“Would you kiss me, before I’m gone?” He whispers, cutting through the quiet room.

“Yes, I will.” Felix replies, unsteady and on the verge of breaking down. 

He brings his lips into Dimitri’s forehead, they follow all over the lines of him as gently as possible. Dimitri let his eyes fall shut, a smile on his lips. Felix hasn’t seen him this happy, or at ease, in many years. Maybe he wasn’t there for it, so he holds him close as he indulges him. Felix’s chest wells up with fear, only kissing Dimitri shouldn’t feel like that, like they’re running out of time.

He kisses around his mouth and Dimitri brings his collar closer, opening his eyes to Felix’s. The sight is as dazzling as it was the first time they met. “Felix, I’m cold.” Felix’s heart drops. 

No.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

It’s not cold, there is no breeze to cool them and it’s the Verdant Moon, they’re under covers but Dimitri is freezing and Felix can’t warm him up no matter how much he touches. This can’t be, Dimitri hasn’t said goodbye to anyone. “I’ll bring the healer.” I’ll bring anyone, everyone and anything can save you, Dimitri holds him still, “it won’t matter.” he mumbles like a secret for only Felix to hear.

He shifts his face to where the sun is rising and the sunshine falls perfectly on him. Dimitri belongs to the sun, Felix has always known it.

Dimitri will go back to the sun, now. 

“Dima,” he rustles and the king’s lips quirk up a smile, so beautiful and daunting. 

“Felix, kiss me.”

And who is he to reject the king’s command? Felix is clueless to the tears spilling from his eyes or to when he started muttering, ‘I love you, I loved you and I will never stop loving you.’ It comes naturally as he holds Dimitri so tightly between his arms.

Dimitri repeats his name, like when they were young and in battles. Warning him from blows and hits, scared and urgent. 

They are old and they have no time to love. Felix was given the chance after the war and for decades after, yet he let Dimitri slip through his fingers. 

They are old but when Dimitri whispers ‘I love you’ with cold lips, Felix feels like they can have another chance, somewhere. 

But today, the king of Fodlan has died in his arms and under the sun. 

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> How do you write old characters? This is so embarrassing. To me, Felix and Dimitri.  
> I read that when people have major crest they're late to age so I imagine Felix's hair is as healthy as ever.   
> Thanks for reading this!   
> and lots of Thanks for Arithra and Emma for beta reading this!


End file.
